mandy12052: (kiss)
2007-07-17 04:48 pm
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mandy12052: (Default)
2007-04-01 02:45 pm
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mandy12052: (flower)
2007-02-13 06:03 am
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I like this...

I could go out tonight and find some stranger
It wouldn't be wrong
No, It wouldn't be wrong
Cause it ain't no crime, no felony
There ain't no chains here holding me down
Holding me down
There ain't no place here on this earth I'd rather be
So why would I leave?

I could want somebody else
I could need somebody else
I could love somebody other than you, but I don't want to

There is no good out there for me now
Theres nothing I can't do without
I can't live without
You make me feel like heavens pooring down on me
I know I'm free

I could want somebody else
I could need somebody else
I could love somebody other than you but I don't want to
I could dream somebody else, be treated like a queen by someone else
I could love somebody other than you but I don't want to

I don't want you to leave

I could want somebody else (I could want somebody)
I could need somebody else (I could need somebody)
I could love somebody other than you but I don't want to
I could dream somebody else, be treated like a queen by somebody else
I could love somebody other than you but I don't want to
I don't want to (I don't want to)
I don't want to...
I don't want to...

Ashley Monroe
"I Don't Want To"
mandy12052: (Default)
2006-10-31 11:37 am
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Here's what's on my mind so many words anyway

Read more... )

Once again, testament to the fact that I am a hopeless, hopeless romantic.
mandy12052: (kiss)
2006-03-30 08:26 am
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mandy12052: (white)
2005-12-18 12:08 am
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Sometimes I'm so fucking sappy, it's pathetic.

lyrics )

Heard this song today. I always really like it.
mandy12052: (clover)
2005-11-16 11:28 pm

On how life is... right now anyway.

Stop Falling )

Just the current state of affairs that seems to reflect my sentiments of late.
mandy12052: (Default)
2005-08-25 03:00 pm
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mandy12052: (flower)
2005-06-27 01:44 pm
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mandy12052: (flower)
2005-06-22 09:16 pm
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Random lyrics... because we love em!

I'm just a sorrow expert now
The more I love
The more I drown
And the saddest part is
The love was ours
And that's what I'd kill for
mandy12052: (flower)
2005-06-21 08:17 pm
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mandy12052: (flower)
2005-06-10 12:48 pm
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mandy12052: (Default)
2005-06-07 04:14 pm
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So I tried to find the lyrics to "Waving Hands" by Neuroticfish online. They are nowhere to be found. All I got were a bunch of websites to buy the album (Gelb). Oh yeah, and the actual website, wherein the lyrics were not printed "because they would no longer be alive and changeable" or something to that effect. Lame. Uber unglaublich! So yeah, the point I"m getting at being, if anyone out there in cyberspace can find the lyrics for me, they ought to send them my direction. It would be much appreciated.
mandy12052: (Pyramid)
2005-04-24 08:36 pm
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mandy12052: (isis-osiris)
2003-12-04 09:48 pm
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Feels like I just walked right outta heaven.

There is so much drama going on in my life right now I almost wonder why I'm taking some time to write in here. I mean, there is so much other stuff I could be doing. I guess it's just the inherent procrastinator in me. That and the fact that I'm too stressed out about all the stuff I have to get done to actually do any of it. Sure, there's plenty I could be doing right now, but I'm just, well, not doing it.

I have to admit, there's a large portion of my stress do in part to all the David drama, which seems to be neverending. I got into a bad situation the other night that I totally could've prevented and now David is totally pissed at me. I mean, he's talking to me and being nice, but I'm pretty sure it's all on the verge of being over. And I feel like I'm the only one who cares. I'm trying so hard to follow my heart, to do what it tells me, and put effort into staying with David and trying to salvage what's left after my destruction. But it's so hard when no one else will support me in that decision. It seems like no one wants me to be with David. My friends are telling me to move on; my mom says that maybe he's no the one; Randy says I shouldn't date him because of his past and my sister agrees; people at work are telling me not to bother, to just move on because supposedly that's what David is ready for. But it's so hard to just give it up after the time and effort I've already put in. And if he's ready to move on, why doesn't he just say so? Why can't he just be straight with me about how he's feeling about the situation? I mean, I know he's mad at me and it's justified. I know he feels like he can't trust me anymore, feels betrayed. But he sometimes gives me the impression that he could forgive me, eventually. Otherwise, why would we still be together? Is he waiting for me to make the move? Shit, everyone else is. It's so damn frustrating, but I just can't do it. I don't want to live without him. He's pulled me in, and now I love him too much to want to imagine things any other way. I hate that I've ended up in this situation at all. I hate that I've let this happen to myself, when I could have prevented it all and been in some happy-go-lucky place right now. But no, I let myself get into a bad situation and didn't do anything to get out.

Fuck. How is it I manage to get myself into these places all the time?

And all I can think about is this song: I Don't Wanna )
mandy12052: (friendship)
2003-08-14 10:39 pm
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(no subject)

Today was moderately uneventful. Bah. I worked all day for what seems like a miniscule amount of money compared to the weekend. I think the fact that I made such a significant amount last weekend increases this impression. Although I must admit that $40 for a 3 hour lunch shift isn't that bad, it could've been better considering how many people found it necessary to leave me like 5%. Annoying.

Speaking of money, my mom keeps thinking I've saved much more money than I have. Don't quite understand this, but whatever. It just means she thinks I'm spending my money on other random things. As if I have time to go shopping for them anyway!

Oh yeah, and Chad swore he would call me today. Needless to say--as I predicted to him when he made such promise--he didn't call. Do I really care? No. Just thought I'd throw that in.

In 5 days I'll be in Albuquerque for school. Thank GOD. I can't wait to get out of here. Oh, and Carolyn was working today. She told me she wouldn't be back in until Friday and so she couldn't call about my transfer until then. WTF?!?!?

Well then, I don't really have much else to add. So here's the lyrics to one of the songs on a CD I'm going to burn that I plan to entitle, The Soundtrack to My Life.

'Love Song For No One' by John Mayer )
mandy12052: (yoda)
2003-08-12 11:41 pm
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"Work sucks, I know.

She left me roses by the stairs.
Surprises let me know she cares."

Sorry... That came out of the strange confines that exist as the thought processes of my mind.

In the news:
The Job )

I went to breakfast after work on Sunday with Michael. I learned a lot about him. It was fun. He is awesome and I would totally date him if there was actually potential at this point in time. But obviously there isn't. I think I will maintain the friendship though. He's very intelligent and does lots of kick ass stuff. He fences, dances (ballet and swing, among others), acts in his friend's independent films and on stage, etc etc. He's the epitome of a renaissance man, both in his intelligence and his extracurricular activities (for lack of a better phrase). So yeah, what I left RL thinking would be a perhaps 1 hour outing turned into about 4 hours. Not that I have any complaints. He is so inspiring. He's one of those people that makes you want to go out and do all of the things you've only dreamed of doing. The things you want to do but don't quite have the guts for. He gives me that kind of confidence. All he says is, "If you want it, then just do it," and I find myself having the desire to accomplish it. Chad always made me want to do things, but he never gave me the desire to, only the confidence. And I think those two things are quite different.

Speaking of Chad...
The Chad )

But yeah, I've thought enough about that for one night.

I read Amber's entry about her grandparents coming to visit and found it a bit coincidental. I saw Judy in RL while I was working the other day. I didn't go over and say anything (not that I would particularly want to), but I saw her nonetheless. Interesting.

So tomorrow is the day I go to ABQ to set up my class schedule. This advisor stuff is kind of annoying. I know it's useful, but it's going to be such short notice for my transfer. Mir. Damn them needing an exact availability. Perhaps I shall take night classes some nights to give myself an edge?

Hmm... I bought another Paul Oakenfold album as a spur of the moment thing yesterday when I went to hastings to buy these books for my Grandma (she and my Grandpa were passing through on their way from Colorado to Arizona). It's a whole bunch of short tracks of stuff he mixed. I've heard about half of it, but I'm not sure what to think yet. I expected it to be a bit more fast paced, but yeah. I guess it's my own damn fault... who wouldn't when they're labeled at approx 200+ bpm? Oh well, it's still good, but I don't like it near as much as the other album, "Bunkka."

I still haven't gotten my vacation paycheck (of course, it's only been like two days) and I'm anxious. I'm worried that it's not going to come until I transfer but then it won't show up on my transfer paychecks or something crazy like that... I dunno. Stuff is weird when you transfer.

Oh... I weighed 160 pounds today, which means I've lost about 5-6 pounds on this new diet. Yay!

Nothing else as of now, and I'm kind of sick of typing. (Goes back to that easily annoyed stuff).